Experiencing the full wrath of a seven-year-old


World War Chloe broke out in our home this evening.

It started more as Daughter (Chloe) v Daddy. My son and I were Switzerland for a while there; trying to stay out of things and hoping the two parties would call a truce.

Thank you so much for teaching me about boundaries - what a great Mum you are!
Thank you so much for teaching me about boundaries – what a great Mum you are!

But then the tide turned and somehow I was right in the thick of it all. My daughter suddenly switched.

But there she was. Answering back at me. Open defiance that totally crossed the line.

And to be honest, as I type this, I can’t even remember exactly what she did to make me send her to her room, but whatever it was, it was the tipping point.

She stood there, refusing to leave. I asked again. No movement. I yelled. Nothing. I yelled again and banged the table out of frustration. She skulked off to her room without finishing her dinner.

The peace was short lived. My daughter stormed out of her room demanding to know how long she need to stay in there. When I said all night she asked how many minutes.

Yes, Mother dear. I will do whatever  you say.
Yes, Mother dear. I will do whatever you say.

Are you starting to understand how this evening started to slowly unravel?

“But I’m starving, Mum!”

“Oh well.”

“But I’m s-o-o-o hungry!”

“Never mind. Please go to your room.”

“No”

“Please go to your room” x 25

“No” x 25

So I threatened that if she didn’t go to her room, then we wouldn’t go shopping on the weekend. And it worked – until she came out again.

When I told her the shopping trip was off, she pulled out the big guns and ran to her room yelling out that I was the world’s worst Mum and that she hated me.

Yep. I got the “I hate you!” outburst about 10 years too early.

Peoples, I have looked into the abyss of teenagerdom – and I didn’t like it.

After a pause, she yelled out from her room “And by the way, you are the world’s meanest Mum!”

Then the bumps and thuds came from within her room. I ignored them for a while, then opened the door. She had torn down a framed photo of myself and her and ripped it up. The pieces were on the floor.

And as cool as cucumber, my little poppet says “Oh, I did that because you are the world’s worst Mum.”

Honestly, I looked at her like she was a complete stranger. I was waiting for her head to start spinning!

And you just know that tomorrow morning, she will wake up as sweet as pie – as though nothing had happened!

Ah, the roller coaster of parenthood, eh? Let me off please!

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